How to Give Someone a Hickey

If you give your loving partner a hickey during a passionate encounter, it can give the session an amazing feel, and playfully mark your girl or boyfriend as yours alone. It can feel great for the recipient, too, if you understand how to give someone a hickey properly.

Understanding Hickeys


Hickeys are known as kiss marks or love bites. They are actually bruises that you (or your lover) will cause by aggressively kissing and sucking on your lover’s flesh. They will appear red initially, since you’ll be breaking blood vessels just beneath the skin. Later, they will turn brown or purplish as they begin to heal.


Why do you want to give your lover a hickey? For one, because they personify passion. They are usually done in the heat of making out, and signify desire. You will powerfully show your lover that she belongs to you, and giving or getting hickeys can add spice to your lovemaking.

You can give a hickey whether you’re male or female.

Get Consent First


 Hickeys are sexual marks, making them inappropriate for work, school or visiting elder relatives. Some may feel embarrassed by them, so never give a hickey without making sure your partner is ok with it first. Hickeys may be painful, too, just so you know! Take it easy if you’re not yet experienced in giving hickeys.

Make your Mark on her


Don’t swoop onto your partner like a vampire. Allow the tension to build up before you show her you know how to give someone a hickey. Kiss and French kiss first, before moving your lips toward your lover’s throat.

Begin with light kissing and then allow the kisses to become more insistent and harder, if she’s ok with it. If she enjoys it, you’re cleared to progress to the next step.

Pick the Right Area


Hickeys are best performed on delicate, thin skin. That’s why they’re often found on a partner’s neck. You might also give her a hickey on her inner thigh or the crook of her elbow.

You can utilize the knowledge of how to give someone a hickey in other areas where the capillaries are near the surface, like the stomach, wrists or midsection. Lick the spot repeatedly before you give her a hickey.


Part your lips just a bit and place them on her skin. Make the letter “O” using your lips, and then press firmly, to establish a seal. Keep your mouth inviting and soft during this time.

Suck the Skin Sensuously


You want to suck with enough force to break the blood vessels beneath her skin, but not hard enough to cause her a lot of pain. 20 to 30 seconds of romantic sucking is all it takes.

As you suck, play with her neck skin using your tongue. It’s sensitive skin, and she will feel everything you do. It may arouse her even more than she is already aroused.

Be tender with her. Don’t allow your teeth to dig into her skin. This isn’t a vampire attack. If you nibble, stop it at that. Don’t bite, unless your partner is into that.

Break the sucking time up with kisses.

Don’t allow spit to build up as you suck her skin. Swallow excess saliva.


End the process smoothly. Give her gentle kisses over the area after you have completed your sucking, and resume your make-out session.


The hickey will appear in several minutes. You can’t usually see it immediately. After five to 10 minutes, it will show up, and it will generally be light pink to a darker purple in color.

article-1-pic-10If you and your partner want a darker hickey, this is optional. Return to the original spot and repeat the hickey process.


If your partner asks you to stop, then stop. She may not like the feeling, even if she was okay with the idea. Respect her wishes. Hickeys are often seen as marks of trust, and you abuse that trust if you continue sucking after she says “no”.

How to Hide a Hickey


Hiding a hickey is as easy as wearing a scarf. It’s fashionable, as long as it’s not hot outside. Wrap it well and check your look in a mirror now and then to be sure it’s staying where you want it.

You can also wear your hair down, if you have long hair, or wear a turtleneck shirt. Again, this only works in cold weather.


Using concealer can work, too. Heavy make-up can cover a hickey. Be sure it exactly matches your natural skin tone.


Covering a hickey with a Band aid ® is outwardly effective, but people will wonder what it’s covering. You’ll need an excuse, like popping a zit or burning yourself, if you have a Band aid ® on your neck.


 Speed up Healing

Arnica cream is often used to heal bruises, and it may work on clearing up your hickey. There are other useful home remedies that may speed up the healing process, too, like ice packs, rubbing with a coin or applying toothpaste.

You may also opt for the cold spoon approach. Wet a spoon and put it in your freezer. After it is frosted, allow it to defrost until it’s a bit less frozen. Press it against your hickey. This will lower the swelling.

Video 1 and Video 2 will show you how to easily give a hickey.

Precautions and Warnings

Don’t try to give your lover a hickey if she has hemophilia. This is a disease that causes the person’s blood to not clot properly, and it could be dangerous to give her a hickey. In addition, if your lover has pale skin, the hickey will likely be larger and more noticeable (and recognizable). Make sure she’s OK with that.

In some cases, getting a hickey might scare someone. If you are receiving the hickey, and you don’t like how it feels, just pull back and tell your partner to stop. ALWAYS respect your partner’s wishes. Hickeys are all about being more intimate, not about forcing a hickey on someone just because YOU think it’s cool.


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